Publicist wanted!

I need to get me a publicist. Sounds a bit odd, I know. Perhaps I should think about getting a job first. But hear me out…

A few weeks back, I briefly skimmed over the details of a controversial interview involving Mad Men’s Christina Hendricks (the sultry Joan) and the Sun Herald’s Kate Waterhouse. If you didn’t catch it, Waterhouse asked Hendricks for examples of how she had inspired others as a “full figured woman”. Hendricks was not impressed by the question. Blah blah blah. Even as a HUGE fan of Mad Men, I wasn’t sure this story warranted my attention during the 15 minute window I managed to steal for myself to read the Sunday paper.

But then yesterday for some reason I actually saw the footage of the (rather awkward) interview.  Forget the debate about the term “full figure”, and who should or shouldn’t be a role model… My only thought was – how cool would it be to have a publicist??

Hendricks didn’t want to answer the question, and all she had to do was look meaningfully at her publicist who then stepped in and managed the confrontation herself. All Christina had to do was smile, and try to recover her composure.

Imagine it…

You’re at the playground and a parent/child duo is monopolising the swings. They have been on them for a full 15 minutes, despite the fact that plenty of other little tackers are clearly itching for a turn. One steely look at your publicist and in she would swoop. “Excuse me, but I would ask that you consider others. It’s just… I can see quite a few children around who would also enjoy a turn. I’m sure you understand.” All you would have to do is smile sweetly, and start pushing.

Or imagine you’re at Shoes & Sox. Normally they have a ticketing system, but when you enter the shop it is out of order. Somehow, at some point while you are waiting, the system starts to work. Others who have come in after you are now jumping the queue even though your 1 year old (who desperately needs new shoes) is clearly losing it and time is of the essence. A pointed glance at your publicist is all that would be needed. “Excuse me – I’m sure you’ll understand… This lovely lady here did arrive before you. I know you won’t mind allowing her to be served next.”

Oh – the possibilities are endless. No more awkward confrontations with strangers. No more sweaty palms, increased heart rates, or post confrontation remorse. Ever since I saw the footage, I haven’t been able to stop daydreaming about it. My publicist is also going to fold my washing.

I guess I really must get a job first. And then we do want to renovate our house, put our kids through school, travel a bit, and have some money on which to retire. Plus, Hubby really wants a nice car. But then, after that, I reckon a publicist would be just the thing…

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